So, she was Schizophrenic

The winter had just begun to hit the eastern Terai plains. The mornings were foggy and wet; afternoons were cold with chilly winds blowing. Most people preferred staying indoors with a warm cup of coffee and a cozy blanket, maybe a book or Facebook and gossips, chitchats. Few were rampaging around the streets wearing stacks of warm clothes, rubbing the palms. It was all fluffy fashion show all round.

“People are preferring to walk rather than ride in the rickshaws”, one of the safari drivers complained. 

“It is warm and healthy to walk in the winter, and it feels good as well”, one of the passengers added, looking towards me. I nodded and looked the other way. I was just staring at the pits and potholes in the road wondering if the flight took off. My grandmother was traveling from Kathmandu. Her flight was supposed to take off at 12.20 and it was already past one o’ clock. The office chores had tied me up and I had fled the first chance I got. I got to the bus stand and climbed on the bus to Biratnagar. The bus was almost empty and I chose to sit on the left corner seat of the last row. I noticed a young couple in a seat few rows ahead of me. They must have been newly married as they were holding each other’s hands tight and would smile each time they look at each other. Such a bliss is young love I thought. And having the chance to tie the knot with the one you love is such a blessing. I wondered what their story must have been.

In the next seat was an old lady fighting with the conductor about the fares. An old man was sitting by her with a very annoyed look in his face, probably her husband. He was silent letting his wife handle the argument. It must have been one of the most important lesson, life has taught him. Besides them there was a girl with her headphones plugged in her ears. She was probably a teenager; a boy was sitting besides her. There was nothing really to do in that bus. I was restless about the flight, continuously logging in and out of the Yeti Airlines site.

The boy got off in another stand and I got to see the girl’s face as she was making way for him. She had fair skin with dark thick eyebrows over her brown eyes and a black bindi on her forehead. She had a lean body frame with probably four-and-a-half-foot height. She wore a fluffy jacket with the zipper untied that revealed her pink t shirt inside. 

“…… I never had a boyfriend,” she was saying. “I always longed for one though. Someone special, someone to love, sometimes fight”, she giggled. She probably was talking on the phone. I wondered what the conversation was about. Her voice was loud and the bus was unusually quiet. 

“My parents are very strict, to tell the truth,” She continued. “They always had me build this wall around me. Don’t talk with random boys, they would say. They even suggested me to be in the circle of common race. You wouldn’t believe me, but you are my first close friend who is not a brahmin.” She chuckled. She must be talking to her classmate, I thought. A new close friend perhaps. They must be discovering about each other. You know, the first few weeks in college when your eyes wander around to find the people who are compatible to be with you. The people you choose to be in a circle with for few years and in memory for the lifetime. These people actually make the college life worthwhile. I imagined the girl on the other side. She must be someone matching her stature and mindset. Maybe she is a Newar or Limbu, I decided to picture her as Newar. Short girl, light brown face, curly hair, probably wearing glasses. 

“I had a small circle of friends. You know Pransa, Apekshya and there were other two girls…. Ya, Apekshya is the tall one. Yes, the one dating Safal. You know Safal is her third.” She giggled. “She had a boyfriend when she was in Sixth grade, can you imagine?”

“She always had this something, you know, very charming personality, I guess…. And ya, a cute face”. 

“We were very close in school. She used to tell me all about her boyfriends. There were many boys after her. She was dating this guy from college. He would pick her up after school in his bike. She would tell me how he cared for her; took her to restaurants and shopping malls. I would warn her not to do anything stupid. She would laugh out loud and say that he is like a saint. They had one kiss, that too Apekshya had to force on him.” She laughed loud and continued, “There was once a time when Apekshya was dating two guys at the same time, it didn’t last long though.”

“Yes, maybe you are right, I feel the same way. Apekshya doesn’t really fit in with Safal. I wonder how long it will last.”

“You know I sometimes envy Apeksya for being so strong. I am very sensitive. I feel like crying for small things. You remember that day in class when I forgot my assignment in the dormitory, I was shaking with fear the whole period.”

“Same happened with my previous land lord. I couldn’t talk with him straight face. He wouldn’t provide us with enough water, there was no place to dry our clothes. His wife was very mean to us. She would start saying bad things if we were ever late. When I told my mom about this, my dad went with me and got me a room in the dormitory. I wonder why I am so sensitive about small stuffs and scared with people all the time.”

“Yes, the food in dormitory is fine. Its very cheap as well, just Rs.50 for a plate. You should change too. Ya I know, you just pay Rs. 2700 per month i.e. Rs. 45 per plate. But you will have to pay even if you don’t eat. In dormitory mess, just pay for what you eat. Just look at me, I spend my weekends at home, that is Fridays and Saturday I save Rs. 200. So, it’s actually way cheaper”.

She continued to discuss about her family, old friends and how Dharan is way better than Biratnagar in terms of almost everything. I myself started comparing these cities to one another. I would prefer Dharan over Biratnagar easily, I thought. As I was indulged in my thoughts suddenly I heard a phone ring. The girl picked the phone and started talking. Suddenly something struck me. If she wasn’t in a call all this time then who was she talking to? Empty seat? I had read an article on schizophrenia just another day. It stated about a mental condition where people see other people and things that don’t really exist. I was dumbfounded. I shook my friend furiously and told him about the girl and how she was talking loud with her imaginary friend. He laughed at me and told me not to eves drop in another people’s conversation.

He said, “She must be on a phone call or something. Don’t be hysterical about it.” He gazed at my disbelief and said, “okay, lets ask her.” I stopped him as he tried to move towards her.

“okay okay, maybe she was.” I tried to hide my exasperation. The conductor announced my stop and I got off the bus.

As I walked towards to the airport gate, I felt like I was missing someone or something behind. My friend from the bus; only then I realized was travelling alone all this time.